Stranded in Self Sorrow

Pain so real,
Heart ache so deep,
Nothing can suppress it
No one can stop it.
Residing in the remnants of my soul,
Never to feel love or joy,
Only to mimick what i observe.
Nothing truly mine,
Just a collection of other people,
Unsure of what to feel.

Told them of all my pain.
But sympathy lasts for merely a day
And then im forgotten.
All my pain and anguish,
Sins and forbidden thoughts,
Gone and washed from their memories.
Life goes on and im still stranded,
On my own island of misery and despair.
Broken heart and soul,
No rescue and sight,
Left here to die.

Fatal End

There once lived a girl,
who cried in secret,
she felt she was bound.
Afraid that in her secrets she would drown,
No one really knew,
Nothing they thought was true.
So she continued to lie,
Wanting nothing more than to die,
Or so she thought.
What she really wished for,
Was for someone to open the door,
To look deep and see,
the girl that lie underneath.
But no one ever saw,
They just believed her to be without a flaw.
No one cared to look past a single lie,
So in her own blood she lay alone and die.

The Real Me

She lies in the opaque corners of her mind,
Surrounded by her fears,
Swallowed up by loneliness,
And the darkness of her own pain.
Cold tears that sting with every drop
Run down her warm russet cheeks.
Alone in the shadows,
Where no one can see,
Is the girl that I use to be,
The girl I still am,
The girl that is ...
Me.

Seeing Everything

Drown it out,
The world from outside.
Feel......numb
To everything.
No thoughts,
No feelings,
Just....numb.
Mind wandering Nowhere,
Aimlessly,
But not searching.
Just....wandering.
Alone, but wanting to be.
Let no one in,
No one.
Breathing slowly,
Feeling it flow in and out,
In a rhythm,
Calm...serine.
Eyes closed,
Darkness all around,
Seeing nothing,
But yet....
Seeing it all.

Uncertainty

Its like a morbid melody coming from my heart,
Drowning out the world and soaking my thoughts.
Not sure what to do,
Was I right?
Was I wrong?
What else was I to do?
Will this pain fade away,
Or was my choice a mistake?
Were my feelings truly what I believed,
Or were they an illusion or just a thought?
All I want are answers,
The truth.
What is it that I really feel,
And is this what I really want?
Please make this wretched song stop
Before I drown in my own thoughts.